Friday, June 02, 2006

Mean Streets of LIC

I've watched After Hours, The Warriors, the Scorsese ouevre. I know that you have to be tough, and lucky, to survive in these gritty New York City streets. But never had I seen with my own eyes that dark underbelly, the menace lurking beneath. Until now. But now I too have suffered.

Okay, so getting my purse snatched by a couple of Vietnamese kids on a moped doesn't quite equal being stabbed 32 times or having Harvey Keitel force me to suck his cock, but I think I will claim my New York moment anyway.

Actually, I don't know that they were Vietnamese, that's just my racist assumption. Actually, it's my husband's racist assumption. My racist assumption was that the two kids in motorcycle helmets who raced by me on their twattish little bike and yanked my purse off my shoulder, pulling me down to the sidewalk and bruising the shit out of my arm in the process, were Hispanic. I based that on the only body parts of theirs that I managed to retain a memory of while screaming "Fuck you, assholes, Fuck YOU!!!!" and shooting them the finger with both hands. Their calves, beneath baggy cargo shorts, seemed somewhat brownish.

But then Eric said, "Hispanics don't ride mopeds."

I wonder if I ought to go into the police station and amend my statement. "I said they were Hispanic, but then I realized they must be Asian because no Mexican would be caught dead on a moped."

That'd probably go over pretty well.

Anyway, the dumb fuckers got two bucks plus $12 on a metrocard. They missed entirely my new white-girl mini blackberry and new white-girl video iPod. So the joke's on them, I guess.

22 Comments:

Blogger Anita said...

YIKES!!!

6:40 AM  
Blogger LovelyGwen said...

That sux. Was it a cute bag? I sometimes mourn the loss of the bag more than the loot!

10:05 AM  
Blogger ColDol said...

I got robed twice in NYC during the course of the year that I lived there. The first time was a grand central station -- my luggage never came off the train when i "arrived". The second time was when I was coming home from an all nighter. Years later, I came to realize that- they could have the dirty socks and the Louis Vuitton luggage -- I have the consumate NY story -- and sometimes having a story of a thousand words is worth the drama and the grief it took to get there. Trudge on Superhero. Even Superman had his bad days. Write more, please!!!!!! And if it makes you feel better you can boycott vietnamese and hispaic foods for a month. Go Kosher...at least they won't rob you...er wait.....

3:17 PM  
Blogger nopalito said...

Julie-
I am Mexican and I ride a moped. I have shattered the stereotypes of Mexicans and mopeds. In fact, one might argue that poor Mexican folk would ride mopeds, on account of the affordability of fueling up and getting to the fifth job across town without wasting away the entire paycheck of the job one just left.

But on another note, I finished reading your book yesterday morning. Very satifying and filling. I read about it on the Amherst alumni magazine (we graduated the same year, but I didn't know you). I was genuinely moved by how your seemingly foibled moments quickly turned into masterpieces. Good job.

6:14 PM  
Blogger Julie Powell said...

I am THRILLED to hear that there is someone out there shattering my husband's random stereotypes. It must be done. And by an Amherst grad! We are truly the greatest generation.... I'm so glad you liked the book, thanks! And I will try to write more, I've become such a lame blogger it's absurd.

6:47 AM  
Blogger nika said...

I am a latina and I too have ridden and even OWNED a moped (meaning I did not steal it).

Nika

8:28 AM  
Blogger e said...

Wow, I read J&J based on a recommendation from a friend who said she saw similarities in you & I... but after this post- which the same friend shared with me- I will have to vehemently deny any likeness between us. First, I am of Asian descent (born & raised in NYC) and I have never owned nor ridden a moped, nor do I know a single other person who owns or rides a moped and I know a LOT of Asian people in NYC. I find it amusing that your husband didn't just say Asian, he said Vietnamese; was there a reason for that as well? Is it because of the stereotypes against Vietnamese people, too? (I am not Vietnamese, I will add.) What is up with this post? Did you even think before you posted it? Sure it's clearly meant to be mostly tongue in cheek, but it's also pretty f*cking stupid.
Oh yeah, I have a "white-girl iPod" - you can't get more "white girl" than a pink mini iPod - what do you have to say about that? I was mugged on my 16th birthday; need I tell you the race of my perps? Oh. They were black.

God, Julie, seriously, I'm not even normally the type of person who gets offended or annoyed over this BS. I watch Mind of Mencia and I laugh. But this post just is overboard, and I have more than a few friends who just don't even know where to begin to tell you off.

9:01 AM  
Blogger six2six said...

and here i thought published authors should know better than to propagate "racist assumptions".

9:08 AM  
Blogger AmiUrAnGeL said...

see... this is what you call stupidity, because it's not like you didn't think before you spoke and you most likely read your entry prior and/or after your posting. Your husband's ignorance is no excuse for you, a published author, to post his racial opinion (especially if you believed he was wrong) and your self-constructed statement for the police (in which if you were trying to be funny, don't quit your day job). I know it's your blog and you can write anything you desire but I must ask.... Have you no shame?

10:32 AM  
Blogger pinky said...

um....amiurangel? She did quit her day job. Massively. Famously.
And honestly, all you offended people, the tone might not have come off just right, but I am thinking Julie was recounting the sort of absurd conversations one gets into when one is trying to make sense of an entirely random moment. It of course doesn't matter what the race was, they could be very tan white people on a moped, we have certainly all seen that, right? Now climb back down out of your asses and go back to your day jobs.

12:20 PM  
Blogger BoughtAndPaidFool said...

I don't think those were Vietnamese. Vietnamese always work in groups greater than 6.
Many compare Vietnamese' likeness to hyenas, right down to the high pitched squeels, cackles and barks.

See here for visual aid: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Spotted_hyena2.jpg

The Vietnamese species are brash scavengers who make no attempt at stealth. They are persistent but remarkably craven when confronted. Perfect opportunists, they always take the path of least resistance.

Most of the time they group together to harass and unnerve female and immature humans by advancing threateningly and noisily shoulder to shoulder, though rarely attacking.

Mr. Dundee

9:32 PM  
Blogger Ovue said...

I couldn't quite place my finger on it before, but after this post, the irony of your accusing Crash of being the whitest movie ever couldn't be more obvious.

10:36 PM  
Blogger alexwh79 said...

I just came back from a wild shopping spree financed by a purse snatching of an oblivious white girl who at the moment was too distracted by her pretty Ipod mini to know what was going on. There was only two dollars in that purse and I didn't manage to snatch her ipod mini due to the minusculality of those things, but I did sell the purse and the metro card for ten bucks to some nice old lady in central park. The nice old lady lauded me for my generosity. I should mention I am white - and hispanic, asian and black. Therefore, I boast the scrupulousness of the white man, the moped-driving abilities of the hispanic man, the inscrutability of the asian man, and the bravado and fearlessness of the black man. The result, as you all may suspect, is a virtually flawless purse snatching machine. Mwhahahahah!

11:15 PM  
Blogger xian said...

Sorry to hear you got robbed. I'm also sorry about the racial stereotyping, but I'd rather you speak your mind than just not say anything. I mean it's not like us folks of color aren't aware of the implicit racism that flies our way. So talking about it is the best approach we've got.

So you deserve encouragement for getting through this mild crime, and props for speaking your mind, and well, even if you aren't going to get props for your racist perspective.

Thanks for the entry.

8:53 AM  
Blogger xian said...

Sorry to hear you got robbed. I'm also sorry about the racial stereotyping, but I'd rather you speak your mind than just not say anything. I mean it's not like us folks of color aren't aware of the implicit racism that flies our way. So talking about it is the best approach we've got.

So you deserve encouragement for getting through this mild crime, and props for speaking your mind, and well, even if you aren't going to get props for your racist perspective.

Thanks for the entry.

8:53 AM  
Blogger xian said...

Sorry to hear you got robbed. I'm also sorry about the racial stereotyping, but I'd rather you speak your mind than just not say anything. I mean it's not like us folks of color aren't aware of the implicit racism that flies our way. So talking about it is the best approach we've got.

So you deserve encouragement for getting through this mild crime, and props for speaking your mind, and well, even if you aren't going to get props for your racist perspective.

Thanks for the entry.

8:54 AM  
Blogger xian said...

sorry blogger is freezing on me and not showing word verification.

Please delete my endless multiple posts :(

once again, my apologies

8:55 AM  
Blogger Bells said...

For what it's worth, I took Eric's comment as a glib statement, not a serious racial slur. I liked Eric, as he came across in the book, very much and so took his comment as mildly witty comment not intended to be a serious racial slur at all! But I'm a white girl too so am probably not overly sensitive to these things.

Glad you survived the ordeal though Julie!

11:45 PM  
Blogger Julie Powell said...

For what it's worth, which I know is next to nothing, these bone-headed "witticisms" that I bone-headedly included here were meant to be a joke about racism, not a joke about races... Neither my husband and I truly think that Hispanics never ride mopeds and Vietnamese always do - that would be an odd thing to think. And if we did, I don't think those generalizations would tend us toward dislike of either minority.

That said, it was stupid for me to say what was a deeply in-joke out in public. Dumb dumb dumb.

I have since posted an apologia, but if you got here from thefoodsection.com, you won't have seen it....

mea culpa.

7:21 AM  
Blogger Rod said...

It seemed to me very obviously to be a joke *about* stereotyping, so I'm not really sure what all the fuss is about.

9:11 AM  
Blogger Leopard1978 said...

I am proud to say this is my first blog comment ever. As of 5 minutes ago I just put down my copy of Julie&Julia. I know you are tired of hearing about cooking. But that is what drew me to the book, along with Julia of course. I anticipated a cute book. In reality the book had cursing, sex, and food. My three favorite food groups. This book was more than I could hope for. I can't wait to see what is in store for the future.

8:11 PM  
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9:33 AM  

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